Crafting Gentleness

Thursday, August 31, 2006

What is your Word?

I have a question to ask to all of you. It comes from a book I am reading called. "The Call" and it seems appropriate to post this question on here given what you are all talking about.

If you had to choose one word with which you live your life by...what would it be? Note carefully that it is not a word that we can do easily or well. Because we cannot teach what we have never had to learn. This word in a nutshell holds the purpose of your lives.

The author Oriah says, "Look at your failures, at the places where you most easily go to sleep and become unconscious about what you are doing. Look at what does not come easily to you, what you long for but find elusive. Think about what gets you into trouble, what gets you way down the road of doing something that you don't want to do at a very high price. What internal habit or tendency repeatedly robs your life of joy?"

She points out that what we love or what we are good at... is not our word. If we cannot say no to the people in our lives ...our word might be "no". If we continually do too much it might be "rest". Perhaps Anthony your word is "gentleness" but I invite everyone to look deeper. If you love a word it may not be it. Our word represents our greatest challenge.

I would say that while I devote a good deal of my life to my beloved words "intuition" and "creativity" my most dreaded word and the theme of my life would be something like "intimacy" or "connection". I think my drive to trust my intuition and to be honest in my creativity is because I want to know myself very well so that I do not lose myself in connection with others. So that I have a strong that is honest and true to my own feelings. I know that this is what I help others with. This is what I am called to teach.

I lose myself in intimate and in one on one relationships. I merge, I become the other...their feelings, their thoughts, their pain. I know what they need more than what I need. I have a big challenge working one on one with people. I take home their pain and I forget myself and then I get mad and withdraw. I prefer leading groups so the support and connection feels evenly distributed. I get a bit twisted up when I think of my word. Quite uncomfortable.

What is your word?


  • Hi Shelly,

    Ant did say we were quite alike. I really see it now.

    My word is abandon. I do the same thing as you, lead so as to determine the quality of my relationships (or I too like you get lost). So I abandon myself. I also hate agreements being broken (that is the person abandoning their commitment to their word).

    I hate people saying one thing and doing another (abandonment). Basically I map where I am in relation to people and feel abandoned if they can't at least sound the call back "this is where I'm at, how I feel, where I think I am".

    *side track* Like the howl of wolves - apparently the howl is a social mechanism to do just what I described above.

    *back on track and change tack* I also dance with wild abandon, cook with wild abandon and love with wild abandon. Can you do these things any other way?


    By Blogger Soooz, at Thursday, 31 August, 2006  

  • I love your word Sooz

    By Blogger Shelley, at Saturday, 09 September, 2006  

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